MYRTLE BEACH, SC — Area man Todd Grainger was overcome with great sadness today, after attempting to order an unavailable food item from local restaurant, Sandy’s Fish Shack. “Aw man, I was really craving some of those crab fritters with chipotle aoli,” whined the 35 year-old man. Despite being offered a myriad of other, similar, dishes the three-and-a-half-decade old man-child continued his petulant assault on his server, Cindy Banks, 23. “Are you sure you’re out? Would you mind checking again? I swear I’m normally not this big of a pain in the ass, but just came all the way from home, just for this,” insisted Grainger. After a briefly pretending to go to the kitchen, Banks returned bearing the same news. “Sorry, we’re all out,” she said, barely managing to imbue her voice with a shred of empathy. “I guess I’ll just settle for the baja fish tacos then,” sighed a defeated Grainger “but you should really let the manager know to buy extra next time.” When it came time to order drinks, Grainger reportedly asked for “that grapefruit IPA” he got at another restaurant, with a completely different beer program, or whichever beer was the coldest.
At press time, Banks could be seen staring into the distance, with a cold dead look in her eyes, wondering if today would be the day she snapped and assaulted a customer.