MCKEES ROCKS, PA — Local man Dale Ryan, 44, reportedly ate the best meal of his life, this past Thursday, consisting mostly of melted cheese. “I’m not any kind of fancy chef or anything, but that has to be the best meal money can buy,” said Ryan patting his belly, now full, almost entirely, with cheese. Ryan could be heard tables away groaning with pleasure as he shoveled spoonful after spoonful of melted cheese into his body, sources inside the restaurant said. “It almost made me sick, but I just couldn’t look away; then I started to feel proud of him, like how the whole school started to cheer for Bruce Bogtrotter eating the chocolate cake in Matilda — he even built a small following of supporters  from the surrounding tables,” said Christina Lynn, a concerned on-looker turned Dale Ryan Supporter. At press time Ryan could be seen signing napkins for his new found supporters.