Posted in Business Economics

United Airlines Introduces Indentured Servant Travel Class.

United Headquarters, Chicago, IL — A new travel program, announced this morning, by United Airlines CEO, Oscar Munoz, will afford customers cheaper flights in exchange for…

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Posted in Business Economics

TAXI FEATURES MOST UNRESPONSIVE TOUCH SCREEN EVER.

NEW YORK, NY — Mayor Bill de Blasio was pleased to announce a new fleet of hybrid electric taxis this week, capable of achieving upwards…

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Posted in Business Tech

CALL CENTER EMPLOYEE HORRIFIED PERSON BROKE THROUGH AUTOMATIC RESPONSE LOOP

BISMARCK, ND — Instant ramen scalded the lap of startled Jason Orlando, 37, as the voice of a frustrated customer filled his headset. “Umm, hello?!…

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Posted in Business Report

REPORT: 90% OF EVERYTHING BOSS SAYS COMPLETE HORSESHIT.

ATLANTA, GA — A striking new study from Georgia Tech revealed today that nearly everything your boss says might as well be coming directly from…

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Posted in Business Economics Food

RESTAURANT LOOKS LIKE FRONT FOR MONEY LAUNDERING OPERATION

NEW YORK, NY — Situated in the heart of the financial district, local restaurant China Chalet seemingly hasn’t served a customer in months. The Chalet,…

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Posted in Business Tech

C.E.O INSTALLS LITERAL GLASS CEILING IN NEW FEMALE EXEC’S OFFICE.

NAUGATUCK, CN – Local C.E.O Wyatt Tanner welcomed his new Managing Director, Diana R. Clinton, with a brand-new office featuring an all-glass ceiling placed directly underneath…

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Posted in Business Economics Tech

WEBPAGE ENTIRELY ADS.

“There’s not a single iota of original content,” her grandson Otis remarked with awe. “It’s all ads.”

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Posted in Business Economics Politics U.S.

COUNTRY NOT GOING IN DIRECTION ILLUMINATI LEADER IMAGINED.

the only remnant of his existence was the smell of smoke that came from his ivory pipe.

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